12 Step Gentleman Guide

1.

Good hygiene is a must. Don't just use a bar of soap/body shower gel, but do scrub yourself. Make sure ears have no wax in them and that privates and facial hair are clean and at least trimmed nicely. When applying deodorant or cologne, don"t use a lot. Also, make sure you don't use too much hair gel (it"s sticky). 

2 

Pay attention to how you look. Wear clothes that fit your body well, eliminate flashy clothing and avoid fashion (i.e. baseball hats cocked slightly to the side). A simpler wardrobe will keep the emphasis on you, not your clothes, which will change your outlook. Get regular haircuts. 

3 

A true gentleman is polite to everyone, in action and words. Always be aware of how you can help people. Wait an extra few seconds to hold the door for the person behind you. Offer to help an old or pregnant person get their grocery bags to the car. You don"t have to be paranoid or risk killing yourself (i.e if you"ve got a precarious grip on something heavy, don't open the door for someone) but respect is paramount. Even if someone is being silly, be polite and respectful. 

4 

Be prepared to ask questions or make statements of courtesy, like "may I help you?", or "let me get that for you", or "I"ll take care of that". 

5 

Don't swear. Ever. Don"t speak of vulgar matter. If it"s too difficult to stop cursing all-together, tone it down a lot. 

6 

Don't stare at and old women/man or say anything degrading to or about them. 

7 

In public, don't  fart, speak too loudly, be overly demanding/offensive, or drink heavily. A gentleman is always in control of himself, body and mind. 

8 

Give girls a little extra respect. Don't be obsequious, but neofeminism has kind of gotten rid of some basic politeness that they'll appreciate, such as opening car/building doors, etc. Don't put every girl on a pedestal (we're all human), but they'll really appreciate it if you do them favors, like giving up your seat on the bus even though they're not carrying anything heavy. 

9 

Don't talk about yourself much. On the other hand, girls like to know a little bit about you so they can understand what you are talking about sometimes. In addition to making you a much more desirable conversationalist, it will make you seem more mysterious to not share too much, which many women find attractive. Get a basic idea of what"s going on in music, sports, and politics. 

10 

Learn to either avoid politics and religion until you know someone better, and learn how to be neutral if someone else brings it up. A simple shrug will do wonders. A gentleman doesn't make other people uncomfortable. 

11 

Pay attention to the fact that the world is more threatening for girls: they're automatically targets at night or in bad neighborhoods. Walk her to her door (or car) if at all possible. It doesn't matter how strong she actually is, if you're a girl people will go at you first, whereas by virtue of being male you"re safer. If your girl has to park far away from her dorm or home, always offer to drive her to and from your destination. She will appreciate how caring you are about her safety. 

12 

Remember to keep doing nice things for your girlfriend when you're around her. If she"s carrying something, pick it up when she puts it down and always kindly let her know by saying "oh, let me get that for you", whatever the object is. Remember, being selfish is not attractive. If you are watching television with your girl and you know she likes a particular show or sporting event, leave it there

by Pream Anand Tharmalingam aka DJ BABY JOE BLACK